don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
are you so shy because you have an std?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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