Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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