i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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