Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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