i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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