i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Semen is not good for contacts.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
