Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
