You can't special order awesome
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Your cock deserves a montage
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Randomize