i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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