I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.