It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
