due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
