I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
