I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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