Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize