Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I love you.
Bad choice
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize