Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Randomize