i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
i came on her dog
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
