as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
These 27 Hilarious People Wrote Their Own Obituaries
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
23 Men Confess What Gifts Would Brighten Their Day
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.