Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize