I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
