Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
