Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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