Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
