He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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