I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize