i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
