Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
