We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize