Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
