New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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