WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
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