writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
