Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
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