I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
You can't just leave with hair like that
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Randomize
