Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
