come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
