Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
