Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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