Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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