My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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