I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize