doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
