In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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