I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize