She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
My penis needs a shock collar
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize