But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
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