so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
