How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
