it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
