make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
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